Tonight I was 100% honest for the first time in probably months when asked how I was doing. Truth is, it’s not great at all. I’m doing my best and taking things day by day.
A year ago our world shattered. Suspected Trisomy 18 for our daughter. Then on our wedding anniversary the worst news we could have gotten, Full Trisomy 18, we were told it was a fatal diagnosis. Life limiting we later learned with hope for time no matter how long.
And then December 16th and 17th 2020 arrived. World shattered again, our newborn daughter was born and she died.
Our daughter was named Noelle Alberta Hope. Meaningful name for a baby we had so much love and hope for.
My grandmother Alberta has been one of the most important people in my life. I’ve known her for over 40 years. The past several months her health declined and this past August 31st, she died.
I have been taking care of so much before she passed and after because she asked me to. This is the last thing she asked me to do.
I miss my grandma terribly.
I’m not ok. And it’s ok to say that.
Two very important people left my life in less than one year. My heart will never be the same.
What brings me peace is my grandmother is no longer in pain.
Hug your loved ones, spend time together from afar, call, email, text, whatever you do don’t let this moment pass without expressing how you feel. Say those I love yous, they could be your last words.
I’m thankful for what time I got this year with Grandma. It will never be enough however it was what it was.
I love you and miss you Grandma!
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